Scotland's Hate Crime and Public Order Act Explained

Hullo, WordJammers! Sergeant Etchasketch (he/him) here from Police Scotland. You'll have had your tea. Now, you may've heard that Scotland's Hate Crime and Public Order Act 2021 comes into force this week, and no doubt you'll have some questions as to what this means. Well, let me just clarify right off the bat this is not an attempt to curtail free speech. Supreme Lead- ah, First Minister Humza Yousaf has been very clear about that. Peace be upon Him. The object is to cut down on hate speech. Put simply, this is verbal, written or electronic communication liable to cause offence and/or incite hatred towards a particular group. 'Course, if you're wondering who decides what's offensive and what isn't, chances are you're the sort of person we'll be visiting very soon.

But let's assume for a moment you're not a straight, white male or J.K. Rowling and you'd like to play your part in helping stamp out hatred in Scotland. The best thing you can do is be vigilant. Take this tweet, for instance, that recently came to our attention:

Now, you may ask what's so hateful about that; after all, the wee las- ah, 'person with a vagina' who posted this is simply expressing an opinion. But this opinion may be triggering to someone who thinks people with tadgers should be allowed into women's spaces - like this stunning and brave person, for example:

As someone with protected characteristics, FemmeBoi would be well within their rights to report Emma if this tweet caused them offence. However, regardless of where you sit on the intersectional spectrum, it's your job as a responsible citizen to put the work in, too! If you hear anybody expressing problematic views, whether it's on social media, in the street or even in your own home, you must pass the details onto us without delay so we can nail the bastards. We may not always have grounds to pursue legal action, but we can put it down on their record as a Non-Crime Hate Incident, potentially hampering future employment prospects. That'll teach 'em for stepping outside the ever-shifting Overton Window. And don't worry about wasting our time with minor cases, either: now we've effectively downgraded theft, burglary and mugging from serious offences to misdemeanours that don't even warrant investigation, we've got ample time to look into hurt feelings and soothe bruised egos. 

'Course, this doesn't stop at public discourse. Oh, no! We've got the arts sewn up, as well. Imagine you're at the theatre watching a play - let's say, for argument's sake, Dennis Potter's Brimstone and Treacle - when you're confronted with a scene like this: 

© BBC

It doesn't matter in this case that the father character's sympathy for far-right politics is informed by the self-loathing and moral outrage he feels after his daughter has been left severely brain-damaged from a car accident, or that the young man - who it's strongly implied throughout the drama may actually be the Devil - plays on these anxieties as part of an elaborate psychological ruse to inveigle his way further into the household for his own ends: if you object to the use of words like 'paddy' and 'picaninnies', or seemingly favourable references to the National Front  and concentration camps, regardless of context, then it is your right - nay, your duty - to report the production to us so we can start rolling-out the prosecutions. Unfortunately at this time the new law doesn't allow us to exhume dead authors and place their carcasses on trial, but until then we'll just have to make do with comedians, actors and directors. Personally, I'd like to see wee stoater Kelly Macdonald get banged up the slammer, but not in the judicial sense.

So that's our new Hate Crime and Public Order Act in a nutshell. Now there are some bampots out there who think this legislation is not only poorly thought out but open to abuse - charges we at Police Scotland take very seriously. For anyone concerned about both the enforcement of this bill and the significant overreach it gives to officers of the law, I can only say whit the fuck ye oan aboot, Jim? Scotland's as free and healthy a country as any other to live right now. Unless you're a hater, in which case yer tea's oot, ye wee sleekit, timorous bawbags - an' this cunt's ready tae fuck some cunt.

Well, guid nicht all. And dinnae have nightmares...