WordJam: WordJam Message Board: Special Discussion

Thursday 14 January 2021

WordJam Message Board: Special Discussion

Today's Topic: Should Donald Trump be removed from Home Alone 2?

JUstinBieberLover39888655592 - January 14, 17:23
I did nt think he was that bad in it

KarenKilla - January 14, 17:24
It's cos he's a FASCIST, asshole. #CutTrumpFromHomeAlone2

JUstinBieberLover39888655592 - January 14, 17:27
Oh I did nt notis that

Biden2024 - January 14, 17:42
I heard they were thinking of replacing him with CGI, like Kevin Spacey in that Ridley Scott flick. Totally on board with that. HA2 is one of my all-time favourite holiday movies and it pains me having Orange Man Bin Laden soil it with his cameo.

MelGibsonIsGod - January 14, 17:51
They should replace him with Jesus. Kevin asking Our Lord The Way would fit the Christmas theme really well.

RussiaBot1917 - January 14, 17:56
Why would he ask Jesus the way to the lobby?

MelGibsonIsGod - January 14, 17:59
Jesus knows all.

RussiaBot1917 - January 14, 18:01
But it's not his hotel, is it? Kinda kills the gag when you think about it.

justiceleague11939 - January 14, 18:15
Bruce Wayne would make more sense. They could digitally change the name of the hotel to keep the joke.

RussiaBot1917 - January 14, 18:22
How would people know it was Bruce Wayne?

justiceleague11939 - January 14, 18:27
They could get Christian Bale in to do it. Then after he tell's Kevin the way to the lobby Michael Caine could make a cameo as Alfred and say something like "The Batmobile's ready, sir"

WhoWatchesTheWatchmen9/11 - January 14, 18:29
(((They))) will probably replace him with (((George Soros))) or (((Louis Farrakhan)))...

RussiaBot1917 - January 14, 18:30
Pretty sure Farrakhan isn't Jewish.

WhoWatchesTheWatchmen9/11 - January 14, 18:32
I didn't say he was Jewish... Why are *you* saying that?

RainbowPrincess456 - January 14, 18:47
Jesus and Batman?!? PUH-LEEEEEEZ!!!! If they replace him with anyone it should be a well-known figure from the BAME and/or LGBTQIA+ community, like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Elliot Page or RuPaul. It would add some much-needed diversity to an otherwise boring, white supremacist, cishet movie.

MAGA1776 - January 14, 19:06
They'll come after Reagan next. Bedtime for Bonzo won't be the same without The Gipper.

Biden2024 - January 14, 19:10
Have fun desecrating the Capitol, TERRORIST?

MAGA1776 - January 14, 19:12
Have fun rigging the election, COMMUNIST?

RussiaBot1917 - January 14, 19:18
Why remove him, anyway? Even Alan Dershowitz said his Capitol speech was protected by the First Amendment, and he's not exactly on Team Trump...

WhoWatchesTheWatchmen9/11 - January 14, 19:19
(((Dershowitz)))

RussiaBot1917 - January 14, 19:20
@WhoWatchesTheWatchmen9/11: Oh fuck off.

Biden2024 - January 14, 19:23
@RussiaBot1917: I don't care. I hope your precious Trump goes to jail and gets raped by Harvey Weinstein.

KarenKilla - January 14, 19:45
@MAGA1776, @RussiaBot1917: I've had it up to here with you nazi-enabling SOBs. You just want freedom of speech without consequences. You better pray I never find out who you are and where you live cos I'll send my Antifa homies round to seriously fuck you up.

BLM4EVA1865 - January 14, 20:11
@RainbowPrincess456: This doesn't end with Trump. They need to replace Macaulay Culkin too. I didn't see him on any Black Lives Matter marches last summer.

KarenKilla - January 14, 20:24
Fuckin A. Culkin is white privilege incarnate. #CutTrumpAndCulkinFromHomeAlone2

RussiaBot1917 - January 14, 20:58
What about Gary Coleman as Kevin?

KarenKilla - January 14, 21:32
Oh, you are SOOO dead, Trump scum. BELIEVE.

BLM4EVA1865 - January 14, 22:04
Will Smith as Kevin.

KarenKilla - January 14, 22:06
And Martin Lawrence to replace Trump, not just as a cameo but as a full character! They could make it a Bad Boys prequel!!!

AllCopsMustFry - January 14, 22:18
Who directed Home Alone 2? Chris Colombus. And who's he named after? The Spanish explorer who invaded America, killed all the natives and set up a slave empire. Coincidence?

KarenKilla - January 14, 22:23
With or without Trump this film is EVIL. #CancelHomeAlone2

Biden2024 - January 14, 23:37
@KarenKilla: 100% this. Always hated this movie.

JustinBieberLover39888655592 - January 14, 23:52
They cud jus black Trump up an put him in a dress. That wuld teech him for bein a fashist

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Trivial Shit That Really Pisses Me Off (AKA: 'It's a Conspiracy, I Tells Ya...')

DVD has long been a godsend for fans of world cinema, especially when the films you're interested in watching have either failed to pick up theatrical distribution in your country or are unavailable via streaming services. Having said that, it's not very reassuring to find the people responsible for marketing these home media releases either have absolutely no awareness of the content of the films they're trying to promote, or - and this is more likely - are quite happy to mislead undiscerning DVD hounds with cover art that bears very little relation to the flicks they're pushing in the hope of making a quick buck. (As a fan of German and Russian cinema, I find this tends to be a regular feature of my consumer life.) I therefore present some examples of this ignorant and, dare I say it, underhanded practice in the vain hope that someone at Entertainment One, Metrodome or the otherwise excellent Arrow Video is actually reading this.

Bring on the accused...

Gagarin: First in Space - DVD release

For some reason, the Entertainment One DVD shows Gagarin as a combination of Keir Dullea wandering around the Regency-era bedroom in '2001: A Space Odyssey', Sandra Bullock holding on for dear life in 'Gravity' and John Hurt about to be orally-raped in 'Alien'. The original theatrical poster may be a little clichéd with its profile shot of Yaroslav Zhalin staring into eternity, but at least it's trying to be awe-inspiring rather than suggesting - somewhat cynically, I think - that the first human being's journey into space was, well, a bit boring.

2. Anonyma: A Woman in Berlin - theatrical poster

Max Färberböck's adaptation of 'Eine Frau in Berlin', based on the anonymous memoirs of a female journalist caught between sexual violence and emotional dependency in the dying days of the Second World War, was immediately controversial upon its release in Germany, and it doesn't require a doctorate in philosophy to understand why. Although it may not be the most sophisticated of films to deal with this subject matter, it's still a very powerful meditation on identity and gender politics that's still horribly relevant wherever women are caught in warzones and forced to compromise themselves, either against their will or to guarantee the safety of the people they love.

Anonyma: A Woman in Berlin - DVD release

"Fuck that: let's put Nina Hoss in a beret and make it look like an espionage thriller instead! While we're at it, we'll make that bloke stood next to her look like a Nazi of some kind. It's all right, no one'll know he's from the Red Army - unless they're the sort of sad bastards who watch the History Channel. And why don't we stick a bunch of planes in the background? Everyone loves an aerial dogfight. Actually, we could do with changing the title, too. What was that really good flick that came out a few years ago called? You know - the one about Hitler in the bunker?"